Interview: Tackling Your Counseling Dilemma

Home Shanti is a counseling centre serving urban Indians with a vision to strengthen society by strengthening families.

It is an effort toward bringing healing, growth, and wholeness to hurting individuals and families. (Homeshanti.org)

Their team of trained counselors is committed to bringing peace into homes by restoring broken relationships, helping parents connect meaningfully with their children, and building strong, healthy marriages and family relationships through professional and spiritual support.

In this interview, Home Shanti counselors share insights into a sobering reality: despite constant access to social networking and living in close physical proximity... sometimes just one floor apart in apartment complexes... people are increasingly lonely and depressed.

Many emotional disorders, and even some physical illnesses, stem from unresolved heart issues... however trivial they may seem. A disagreement with a mother-in-law or another family member may appear minor to some, but for others, it can significantly impact physical, emotional, and mental health, affecting overall functioning.

Below are their responses to common questions about counseling to help you address your own concerns and dilemmas.

What Is Counseling? Who Is a Professional Counselor?

Counseling is often confused with guidance or advice-giving. While the field has developed significantly in India in recent years, misconceptions still remain.

Counseling is a professional process of walking alongside an individual to alleviate emotional distress. It involves helping individuals recognize their own potential, improve coping mechanisms, and find solutions using their own internal resources.

It is important to understand that counseling is not about telling people what to do, dictating how their life should look, or “fixing” their relationships for them. Rather, healthy change occurs when new perspectives are gained, options are explored, and appropriate boundaries are established.

A professional counselor is someone who has completed formal training in counseling and holds a recognized certification or diploma, along with supervised clinical experience. Professional counselors work with individuals, families, and groups to address emotional and behavioral concerns using established therapeutic approaches.

Who Needs Counseling?

The short answer: everyone.

The longer answer: counseling benefits anyone who desires personal growth, clarity, new perspectives, or freedom from stagnation. It is for those who want to identify their strengths, address challenges, and improve overall well-being.

Many people hesitate to seek help because they believe therapy is only for those who are “mentally unstable.” The truth is that everyone needs a safe space to be heard without fear, shame, or judgment.

Counseling enhances quality of life, clarifies goals, and helps create practical strategies for emotional and relational well-being.

When Should You See a Counselor?

You may choose to see a counselor whenever:

• You feel stuck and unable to move forward

• You are struggling internally or in relationships

• You are facing a difficult life situation

• You want to overcome unhealthy habits

• You need additional emotional support

It is often beneficial to seek help early... before problems intensify or spread into other areas of life.

Must Marriage Counselors Be Married?

There is a common notion that only married counselors can effectively address marital issues.

However, meaningful change does not depend on a counselor’s marital status or age. Personal life experience alone does not guarantee professional competence, and maturity is not determined by age.

Marriage and family counselors are specially trained in family systems and relational dynamics. Whether married or unmarried, they are equipped to identify core issues and help couples work toward restoration.

What Should You Expect from a Counselor?

You can expect your counselor to:

• Listen respectfully and without bias

• Maintain confidentiality

• Be transparent about therapeutic approaches

• Work at a pace that is comfortable for you

• Show empathy, warmth, patience, and respect

At the same time, counseling can be emotionally challenging. Painful memories and intense emotions may surface during sessions. Healing often requires confronting what hurts.

Beneath the pain and heartache lies growth and transformation. Tending to your emotional life requires vulnerability, patience, and commitment to the journey.

How Long Does Counseling Take?

The duration of therapy varies from person to person.

Sessions typically last between one hour and ninety minutes. The overall length of counseling depends on:

• The nature and severity of the concern

• Personal readiness for change

• Consistency in applying new skills

A 2001 study published in the Journal of Counseling Psychology found that many clients experienced significant improvement between the seventh and tenth sessions. Some individuals may feel relief even after the first or second session.

However, it is advisable not to terminate counseling abruptly without discussing it with your counselor.

The idea that “once in therapy, always in therapy” is a myth. Many individuals go on to live healthy, constructive lives once they have acquired the necessary emotional tools.

Is Counseling Confidential?

Confidentiality is a cornerstone of professional counseling.

Counselors are legally bound to protect the information shared in sessions. They will not disclose your concerns without your prior written consent.

Exceptions to confidentiality include:

• Risk of self-harm (e.g., suicide)

• Risk of harm to others

• Situations involving national security or legal obligations

The confidentiality policy is clearly explained during the first session.

Can Counselors Read Minds?

No. Counselors and psychologists do not read minds.

They are trained to observe verbal and non-verbal cues, emotional patterns, and behavioral dynamics. When a counselor accurately reflects your feelings, it is due to professional training and attentiveness... not mind-reading.

How Can You Get the Best Out of Counseling?

To make your counseling experience meaningful:

1. Be Punctual

Arriving on time shows respect and ensures you receive the full benefit of your session.

2. Commit to Change

Growth requires effort both inside and outside the therapy room. Complete agreed-upon assignments and practice new skills consistently.

3. Communicate Openly

Share honestly with your therapist about your experience... whether you feel connected, whether your expectations are being met, or if something needs adjustment. Open communication strengthens the therapeutic process.

When Is It Appropriate to End Counseling?

Clients may choose to discontinue therapy for various reasons:

• Goals have been achieved

• Emotional strength and clarity have been restored

• A need for a break

• Lack of connection with the therapist

If you decide to end counseling, it is important to discuss this with your therapist. Doing so provides healthy closure and honors the work accomplished.

National Counseling Helpline

Home Shanti has established a National Counseling Helpline: 1860-425-6555.

This initiative aims to bridge the gap between the growing demand for counseling and the limited number of trained professionals in India. By training counselors and building a nationwide network connected through a single helpline, Home Shanti is working to make professional help accessible across the country.

Help is just a phone call away. (Homeshanti.org)